Drink Your Cool-aid
Imagine for a moment you speak to your child the way you speak to yourself. You would suck as a parent. Yes, I said it. Think about it. You tell your kids things like, “you’re not smart enough, you’ll never do that, its too hard.” You wouldn’t tell your child that. At least I hope you wouldn’t. No. You would do the opposite. Providing them with hope, encouragement, support and being their biggest cheerleader.
If your child is having a hard time in sports or a class, you would support them in any way possible. You would hire tutors and coaches. You would sit with them and help with their school work or take them to the field or court to practice. You would remind them it takes time to get better and to keep trying and showing up everyday. You tell them the story of Tom Brady being drafted in the 6th round and became one of the best to every play professional football. To encourage them that it’s not where you start, but where you end up. That work ethic, time and commitment matter.
You remind your child of when they first learned to ride a bike. They fell down all the time and then, it stopped. They were riding their bike on their own with no support. Your kid breaks an arm or an ankle and can’t play on the team until their fully recovered. So you tell them they’ll come back stronger from this and time will fly by.
Along the way you would be lifting your kid up and not burying them or dragging them down. You would actually, deep down, mean every word you say to your child. Because you love them and want to see them happy. You want to see your kid make the team, win the game, ace the exam, come back from an injury and see them succeed.
So why do you tell yourself the complete opposite of what you tell your child? You kill your dreams but give life support to theirs. You tell yourself it’s too late but then tell your child they have all the time in the world. You tell yourself that life is virtually over and you cannot live your dreams. Reciting I used to statements in your head. I used to run all the time…I used to love writing/reading/cooking/baking/volunteering/etc…
Well you still can. It’s not too late. Maybe it’s time you drink your own Cool-aid. In other words, practice what you preach. Why tell your child they can but then turn to yourself and say you cannot. You can too! You also have time. You also will come back strong. You also can do whatever it is you want. You just have to want it bad enough.
You, mom/dad/parent/guardian, are guiding your kids with how you live your life. Not by what you say. If you didn’t encourage and try in life for yourself ultimately they will not do it with themselves either.
What will you be? An ancestor or a ghost? (This is a previous blog I wrote, I linked it below for you to read. This will tie this down nicely)
An Ancestor or a Ghost
Parenting is a difficult job. A task that never ends and a job with few perks and rewards. You may be a stay at home parent, a working parent, co-parent or someone doing it all alone. At each stage of life for children there are new challenges and difficulties. Also, the level of worry increases and so does the stress. Parenting is hard, if you do it ri…
Thought Provoking Questions : What will you be? An ancestor or a ghost? Are you drinking the cool-aid? Are you practicing what you preach to your child? Are you just talking about it or do you actually live it?
Dan Roman is a writer that releases a daily meditation. A quick read. Sharing wisdom and asking thought-provoking questions. Influenced by the obstacles, success and failures in life and of others. Using history, books, current events, philosophy, and ancient wisdom. These writings are actionable, thought-provoking, designed to make your life better.
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