There is this idea of originality. We all want to be different. Look different. Stand out from the crowd. However, in so doing, we end up looking like everyone else.
Ralph Waldo Emerson explained it beautifully;
“Most of our spending is done to forward our own efforts to look like others.”
Why do you like that car? Studies indicate there’s a high probability that the car you drive is based on what someone else likes and you made that interest your own. Morgan Housel in his best selling book The Psychology of Money uses this as an example. To paraphrase, the person pursuing the expensive car wants the expensive car to look like something or someone us. So, once they have it the driver simply wants other drivers to look at them. However, rarely does anyone look at the driver. They just stare at the car.
In the personal finance space there is this idea of keeping up with the Joneses. This catch phrase is used to explain that we simply want to keep up with an image, a facade. Something untrue. Keeping up with the financial moves of our friends or people we know on social media. All of which are at the risk of financial ruin, high amounts of debt and the looming fear of it all crashing down. “The Joneses are broke,” as Dave Ramsey is known for saying. Yet we want to be original. How can we be if we simply do what other people do to look like them. As the expression goes, you buy things you cannot afford, things you don’t even like, to impress people you don’t even like.
There are deeply rooted reasons why keeping up with The Joneses is a common path for many today. Most of which are beyond the scope of this blog post. To stay true to the wisdom shared by Ralph Waldo Emerson, if you find yourself spending more than you should in order to look like someone else, than you must stop. Today. Don’t put it off, do it now.
All of our tastes and interests have an influence. A certain brand or vacation spot is introduced by others. Truthfully, there rarely is an original idea. The point is, we all copy someone else in something. What we emulate, the identity we assume and take on is what matters. Buying a bigger home, a more expensive car, and buying the article of clothing based on the name sewn into the label. Is all of this necessary?
You’ve seen the photo. Warren Buffett and Bill Gates standing together. No one can spot a single brand, logo, or pattern that may be associated with a brand. Professional football player John Urshel is worth millions of dollars and he manages to live on $25,000 a year. I wrote about NBA star Kawhi Leonard that drove the same 1997 Chevy Tahoe he has since he was a teenager, even after signing a contract worth over $100 million. To go back to Buffett, he lives in the same house he bought in 1958 for $31,500. Warren Buffett is worth billions.
We don’t need another them in this world. We need another you. Be true to who you are and not a costume of what you think we want. No one is actually looking at you the way you think they are. Everyone is just focused on themselves. So with that, be free from the perceptions. Untie yourself to the image that modern society focuses on and be true to yourself.
Thought Provoking Question 1 : What do you spend money on and why?
Dan Roman is a Husband, Father, and writer that releases a daily blog. A quick read on sharing wisdom and asking though-provoking questions.
What are your thoughts on this piece? Comment below…
I am not a big spender. No lavish sneakers, cars, etc. If I had to think about what I do spend money on most besides responsibilities it would be my children, my house decor because I love to feel good in my space, and food-eating out.