December 27, 2024
When I have an idea to write about or find material in my note cards or reading that I feel would work, I'm paralyzed or rather injured with procrastination.
"Danny, this does not make sense," I tell myself.
"This idea is not good. Your writing sucks..."
Procrastination gives us permission to treat ourselves like trash. Since I write everyday, not just on this page for you to read, I also write on paper with pencil - I face this beast every day. I face these thoughts that my idea is terrible, that my writing sucks and no one wants to read my shit.
Because this happens to me everyday, I've come to expect it as part of my writing process. If I don't feel procrastination lurking, to the point I don't want to write, something is wrong., procrastination is a good sign. Self-doubt is one of the infinite tricks procrastination plays on me, on us.
It's whole pitch is to step in and undermine the trust, confidence and belief we have in ourselves.
The more self-doubt I feel, the more procrastination is near - tells me I'm doing what I need to do. Which is to show up everyday and write.
If I weren't doing what I need to do, procrastination wouldn't be trying so damn hard. The way to get through or past procrastination is to recognize its presence. Acknowledge what its role is. That is what I do. If I don't feel it, something is wrong.
And because I do feel it, I am where I'm supposed to be. Its all good, so, now I can just keep on moving along.
We cannot negotiate with procrastination or argue with it, it’s doing evil work. Like a cancer that grows at rapid speed, it has the potential to take us out. "I see you procrastination, thank you for being here. From the neck down Danny, from the neck down … that’s all I need to get started. “
For more on my reference of "neck down," visit last weeks blog post, December 20th, for context.