Adopting a Family
As a kid I don’t remember receiving many gifts for Christmas. Being raised by a single mother both my old brother and I had what we needed…
As a kid I don’t remember receiving many gifts for Christmas. Being raised by a single mother both my old brother and I had what we needed, the bare essentials. Money from my memory was always an issue for us. Mom, with no education beyond the 11th grade, always worked. But her work due to her lack of education and exposure to other things never paid well. Even in her final years of life her salary did not match the amount of work and effort she gave. Mom was in manufacturing all of her working life, until her final days with us. Despite her not making much money, she always found a way to give to others. In my mind I can picture her saying, “ I can give my kids some presents for Christmas or I can give it to kids that are having a hard time.” So, she gave it to the kids having a hard time.
This memory is tattooed in my brain. Each Christmas her employer would have a Christmas tree set up and on that tree were stars. Each star had the name of a kid, their age and three things they would love to have. The job had some rules; pick only one kid and only buy 1 thing.
Mom being the rule breaker that she was, picked 10 kids. I don’t know why she went with 10 instead of 8 or even 15. Only she knows that. The best part about this whole thing is that Mom and I would go to the store and I would help her pick out the things for these kids. Another rule broken was Mom would buy each kid everything on that list. As an adult and father myself, it’s a memory I value, a lesson I cherish and something that I would love to do, with our daughter.
How could Mom afford to do this when sometimes we didn’t even have a tree? Many years, not even gifts to go around.
Knowing Mom she found a way. Moreover, Mom was a giver, in all parts of her life. She had a tender place in her heart for people going through things in life. I’ve inherited that. I had a great example with Mom. Also, I know how blessed I am to be where I am in life and have the “things” I have. Furthermore, how blessed I am to be in the financial space I’m in.
So my wife and I did the same this year. We picked 6 kids this year. Three boys and three girls. Their names written on a star, with their age and what they want for Christmas. It was just as fun this time as all the times I did it as a kid with Mom. It was exciting to go shopping for these kids and I do not like to shop. I felt like a kid again. I was with my wife doing the shopping but I felt Mom with us.
The shocking truth is many of these kids ask for basic items that one would not consider a gift. Such as socks, gloves with a scarf, a jacket or coat, shoes or a blanket.
My dear Mother has passed away due to Covid in December 2020. So doing this really was an emotional experience for me that I cannot wait to continue doing and having our daughter help out. We have stuff. We can buy what we want. But it’s more important to give, from your heart, to people or kids who need it. That is what the holiday spirit is all about.
Mom would give strangers a ride, help other single moms pay their bills and cook for someone sick. I remember mom bathing a woman that could not bathe herself due to a massive surgery and she helped a different woman out of an abusive relationship.
Mom sure was incredible. I hope to be half the person and parent she was.
May this move you in the same way it moved me by writing it. Happy Holidays!
Dan Roman is a Husband, Father, and writer that releases a daily blog. A quick read on money, marriage, parenting, self-improvement, development and his thoughts. Dan is also Founder/Creator of Roman Solutions, a Personal Finance Firm that currently provides coaching and education.
To connect with Dan visit: https://linktr.ee/bydanroman
Or by email : financialdifference@danromansolutions.com